For the longest time, the groom’s responsibility has been to pop the question and let the bride pour her heart and soul in making sure the big day is a success.
Yes, the groom hasn’t always been a couch potato as far as wedding planning goes. But in this day and age, a bit more effort is required not only to have a successful day but also earn a few bonus points from your soon-to-be wife.
So, what should you be doing?
At the very least, these seven things.
1. Choosing Your Best Man and Groomsmen and Overseeing Them
No one knows your friends and close confidants better than you. And these are the people who suit best your side of the bridal party.
Thus, choosing the groomsmen and best man is entirely your responsibility.
And once the question has been popped, you need to quickly get into their suit fittings, plan all their other activities, and have a proper schedule set up.
Yes, sometimes doing all these can be quite overwhelming. And that’s why you need to outsource the help of your best man when you can. Part of his responsibility is to make sure your wedding planning doesn’t go haywire thanks to too much pressure.
2. Writing Your Vows and Practicing Them
If you are writing your vows for the big day, then you better start early. This will give you the time to write a heartfelt message to your soon-to-be wife that will not only capture her emotions but also that of the guests as well.
“What if we have traditional vows to recite instead?”
Still, start practicing early. This will not only give you the confidence to say them to your bride on the D-day but also help you develop the right kind of emotion for the entire vow.
3. Choosing Gifts for Your Best Man and Groomsmen
It’s not just enough to pop the question to your pals to be your best man and groomsmen. Once they say yes, you need to show gratitude by gifting them a nice token of appreciation. And since you know these men best, this responsibility lies on you.
The biggest question here would be, “What should I get them?”
The answer is quite simple – personalized gifts.
Personalization gives a rather general gift a personal touch. This means that you can get everyone a beer and cigar gift set, but because each came personalized with the person’s name, everyone will feel you took the time to personally think about them before getting this gift.
Vendors such as groomsmen gift source allows you to create this personal touch in every item you purchase. Etsy is another platform where you can get such kinds of personalized items too.
4. Planning the Guest List Together With Your Bride
The wedding guest list should be prepared jointly by the bride and groom. Each would have a list of their friends and family that they would like invited. And once both of you have this list ready, you should sit down and consolidate the names to a final, all-inclusive list.
More importantly, as the groom, you should follow up on your parents and get to know who they would also like invited to the wedding.
And once the listing has been done, the wedding guestbook should be next in mind. Remember, this is the item that guests will meet first at your wedding reception.
So, your best bet is to take some time to shop for some wedding guestbook alternatives, especially if the traditional ones don’t suit your wedding theme.
5. Purchasing the Bride’s Proposal Ring and Band
You probably have already proposed to your bride, meaning the proposal ring is already out of your to-do list.
But did you get her a wedding band?
Wedding bands and proposal rings go hand in hand. And just in case you left this out (most men do), give her another surprise by purchasing this or asking her to go out with you and pick one.
And if you’re yet to go through the proposal, make sure you do the full shopping.
6. Pay for the Marriage License and Offset the Officiant Fees
A common question among most grooms is, “What should I pay for?”
This is one of them. It’s a traditional groom’s responsibility.
Traditional etiquette dictates that you need to foot the marriage license and officiant fees. You need to do your research on how much these fees will vary and the timelines within which you can get these licenses.
Typically, the wedding license fee will vary by location, with most applications being made a few days to the wedding.
In most cases, the officiant fee may have already been incorporated into the ceremony fee. But if not, make sure this is coordinated too.
7. Plan for the Rehearsal Dinner with Your Parents
Finally, you need a sit-down with your folks, to plan and pay for the rehearsal dinner. Traditionally, these are costs that the groom and his parents foot.
The rehearsal dinner is held a night before the wedding after you’ve run through how the wedding ceremony will proceed, the next day.
This dinner is usually reserved for the wedding party and immediate family. However, out-of-town guests may also be invited. As far as invitations go, this is something you can decide with your bride and parents.